Over-concern can cause harm to a relationship.

from painetworks.com

Have you ever encountered a time when your concern became too “naggy” and it back-fired on you?

I just had my experience yesterday. My wife will be bringing this group of kids to a seminar and she had not been well. She kept coughing and had fever.

Now she is better. I think I got too “vocal” in expressing my concern to her that she needed to exercise more on normal days.

It got back-fired when she told me my words of concerns became too confronting and it sounded like a lecture.

I withdrew and reflected how I should have said it so that it could sound more gentle. Again, an explanation of the intention with a hug makes the situation less theatening.
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To me, marriage is like a little seed. If you want to nurture it into a strong tree, there must be care and love given everyday.

Many times, such acts of love disappeared after the wedding day.

from painetworks.com

I was crossing the road one day and I saw an old man in his seventies, holding his wife’s hands tightly. They were walking very slowly and were struggling to cross the road. However, I saw from the old man’s face, he was determined to ensure his wife was safe by holding her close to him.

His wife was in her seventies too.

At that point in time, I realised the power of love and had the belief that love can be sustained even till death do couples part.

It is not easy to maintain relationship. No one said it is. Even mother-daughter relationship has its ups and downs all the times. So does marriage.

In fact, to make sure our relationship grows into a strong and lasting one, acts of shower of love must be done on everyday basis.

There is no need to splurge lavish gifts on the woman of your life. All you need to do is to take note what matters to her.
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Some brides have emailed me their biggest headaches during wedding planning.

from targetwoman.com

The number one anxiety brides may have is the doubt if they have married the right man.

Marrying the right guy determines the happiness of the ladies forever in their marriage life.

You know it is just like taking the wrong move may throw you deep down into well and sealing the well later.

Happiness is very subjective. Money can make some women really happy. Others used benchmarks such as career success and relationships with their spouses.

There was a survey done to find out what type of men women want as their life-long partners.
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Marriage is a life long journey and if marriage is a Ph.D course, you will only get your report card on the last day of your life on this world.

Marriage is a life-long journey. There is no right or wrong. There is no textbook that teaches you what an ideal marriage life is.

Everybody’s marriage differs. So do yours and mine.

I know some couples who are getting married signed up for marriage preparation course. They learn about experiences from the teachers, other couples plus some powerpoint slides showing the number of things they have to do if they want their marriage to work out.

Yes, marriage preparation can give the couples some basic insights of what marriage is about. However, some of my friends who attended them said it was a complete waste of time.

from catholic.org.sg

In fact, for me, the routine in a marriage is more important and effective than just attending a few sessions of a marriage preparation course.

Everyday is going to be stressful for the husband and wife, especially nowadays both are working adults.

When couples returned home, they bound to want to unload their stress on each other. The purpose again is not to find a solution but just to seek a listening ear.

What has been helpful for us is me and wife will go for a 1-hour walk around our house just before we sleep. The night is quiet and peaceful and it certainly is the best time to share with each other’s daily events.
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Many times, people mistook wedding as complete tied-down. The women are tied to the families for the rest of their lives. Men committed to the families for life.

from fortburnett.com

Men and women dished out their dreams, aspirations and hopes. Men and women forgot that they were once individuals. They forgot they were once children and children love to dream.

I have female friends who after their weddings wanted their husbands to give up their dreams of making it big so that he could spend more time with his family.

After their weddings, some men wanted their wives to give up their careers to be full-time home-makers.

In our world at this era, these don’t make sense at all.

Only the rarest gems will say “yes”. So if your spouse says “yes”, you are one lucky person out of a million.

Would you want to give up all your goals after getting married?

Personally, I believe husband and wife can work out a plan to support each other’s dreams.
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