Men and women are not alike. Men will never understand why women talk so much and can feel so much. And women will never understand what is in a man’s brain. (Not necessarily sex all the time.)

However, there is a similarity between men and women. (Thank God there is some way to talk sense into women somehow.)

The similarity is something each of us wants and really wish for. Do remember this after your wedding.

Do you know what it is?

It is called “respect”.

Each of us wants to be treated with dignity. We don’t want to be spat at and neither do we want our esteem to be tattered.

All of us want to be treated with the utmost respect.

And so do you, be it you are a man or woman reading this post.

After posting this post, a reader emailed me that “wow, you can read a person inside out and won’t it be scary? Aren’t you manipulating other people’s feelings too?”

I don’t think so. Neither do I see as a manipulation of feelings. I prefer to see it as a conscious effort to place my spouse’ position in all discussion.

As the cliche says, put yourself in other people’s shoes. It is very true indeed.

Those couples who are not conscious about what they say and not say (their non-verbal) are actually doing more harm.

Let’s say you may be unaware that you are infact rebellious even though people see you as soft and easy-going. Part of your nature may be ready to retaliate, possibly because at home you never had the chance to in front of your authoritarian parents.

So one day, your wife said something in a similar stern tone as what your dad did in the past to you as a little girl. Something in you is triggered and you barked them without hesistation and stormed off.
Continue Reading »

“Life is boring.” most couples would say.

“There is nothing else to do.”

I personally believe there is so much things you and your husband can do together everyday.

1. Unwind Together
For a start, after a busy day at work, you and your dear can sit together over a cup of Earl grey and update each other about the days’ happenings.

Do allocate some time to share and hear from both parties so that both husband and wife have equal amount of time to share and unload their emotional barges.

We won’t want so much of over-talking from only one party, leaving no chance for the other to unwind at all.

2. Sleep Together
Continue Reading »

Couples evolve from couple who are in love to teen couple to wedding couple and finally to married couples and hopefully, they always stay as loving couples till when they are old couple.

Some couples may become hot couples and end up as celebrity couples.

You realise that even during couplehood, there is a passage for them. And of course, there are some who turn out to be flame-extinguished couples.

It is not easy to sustain the flame. As loving couples who are madly in love when they first see each other, the flame is on number 11 in a scale of 1 to 10!

The teen couples are madly and deeply and sometimes, blindly in love.

They eat together, study together or even stay in the hostel together (though it is illegal to do so.)

Every where they go, they are seen as one romantic teen couple and the world seemed to revolve around them.

Likewise for office love affair, it seemed like there is always romance in the air. They are seen working together, lunching together, going to work together and leaving the office together.

Eventually, when the relationship died down, you may end up seeing only one does the routine alone.
Continue Reading »

My friend Stuart Tan wrote a post on the relationship between relationship and business.

I always believe that a strong relationship starts at home.

For those men who want to succeed in business, find a good wife who love you and can take good care of your family.

Of course, in return, you have to respect and love your wives even more.

Do look around you at those succesful businessmen. Most, or in not all, have a stable and loving family at home. When they go to work, they are very assured that their families are well-taken care of at home.

What about those with problems at home?

Or let’s look at yourself. How do you feel when you quarreled with your girl-friend or wife and then you go to work?
Continue Reading »

I know many of my married friends have never done houseworks in their lives.

Before their weddings, most have domestic helpers at home to do their houseworks for them from folding their clothes to picking up their shoes which were strewn around the house when they got home.

After married, what will happen to the newly-married when both of them do not do any housework in the past?

What will happen to their kids?

I remembered one of my female friends who told me that her mom’s cooking was one of the worst in the world. She doesn’t even know how to light the stove.

These poor children were so deprived of their mothers’ cooking. They have everything in the world but they had never tasted what home-cooked food is like.

That is pathetic, isn’t it?

So, I urged that newly-married couples must do the housework and not outsource it in any way from engaging their mothers’ maids to clean up their house once a week or eating outside food for 365 days in a year.

I know doing housework may not seem to be part of the wedding contract. But welcome to the reality. You are going to move into your new house and there bound to be housework to be done because it is a house unless the house can work by itself and it is not mostly to be.

So, wedding couples, after their weddings, really have no choice but to do their houseworks, whether they like it or not.

So here are 37 reasons to help you justify why housework must be done:
1. Increase sense of ownership of the house
2. No one, except yourself, knows what can be thrown or not
3. Up-keeping of hygiene
4. Do you want to have cockraoches as pets? If not, you know what you need to do.
5. Bonding between husbands and wives
6. Learning to delegate tasks
7. Practice assigning responsibilty e.g. wife cooks and husband washes the dishes
8. Something to look forward to at the end of the week
9. Exercising time
10. Can help to reduce your tummy and it is FREE!!!
Continue Reading »