Though her birthday is just one day, normally the celebration will last for 1 week. Everyday will be filled with surprises in terms of small gifts, special food or other little ways that I can think of.??
I have given her her first gift yesterday. Today, I gave her another one. Tomorrow another one!!! and so on…she deserves all these…and much more…
Now, I’m doing her main gift…it will be hand-made, hand-typed, hand-written, hand-delivered…so watch out for my next few postings on my ways of showing appreciation to my fiancee…
Meanwhile, can you guess what my gifts are?
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We are both working. Working adults are busy. Stress from work. Loads of paper to clear. Numerous datelines to clear. Most working adults are half-dead when they are about to leave the office.?
Those with children have to take care of them. Although tired, the children still want to spend them with the parents. Working take up about 12 hours a day. 6 hours is for sleeping and the remaining 6 hours is for chores, settling matters, shopping, rest, more sleep perhaps…or do paperwork that has been brought back from office.
Many couples seldom spent time each other. After marriage, the time set aside for park-tohing (dating in singlish) is almost non-existent. “We are so busy with our work and so dead tired..where got time??”
I know it is not easy to consciously set aside time for each other. For me, Fridays are always blocked off no matter how busy we are. No work..no topics on work…just going out and spend time with each ohter… or just sitting together in living room and watching tv/ comdies/ variety shows and laughing together…the point is whatever we do doesn’t really matter…what matter most is the time spent with each other…so after reading my post, won’t you put aside some time next week to spend with your love ones? And what will both of you be enjoying together?
Exploring places which sell good food is one of our past times.
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This blog won’t be complete if I just post the positive side of a relationship. Conflicts and Happy moments come in a package. The tools of handling the conflicts and whether you know how to cherish the Happy moments are learnt during the relationship.?
We have our fair share of disaggrements and conflicts and misunderstandings. Which couple doesn’t? If there is, better watch out. A dormant volcano may suddenly erupt with a very very loud BOOM!!! And the mess will be hard to clean up. It is always easier to clean up the mess that come in small amount now and then.
Don’t know what I am saying? I am referring to the quarrels and arguments that may come now and then and catch both of you off guard. Not managing well may bring your relationship downslope.
Lately, we have some issues that we disagreed on. It led to some arguments. I won’t really say we shout at each other like what we see in TV dramas. But we negotiated and mediated among ourselves. We kept cool and kept our volume down. Remeber to phrase your words properly. Don’t say “You”. It sounds threatening and sound pushing the blame on others. Use”I”…I feel this, I feel that…Lots of clarifications on what the party is saying.
We talked it out and constantly reminded each other that we are tackling the issue, and not against the other party. Phrase your sentences, no harsh words…or else you will regret!!!
Easier said to be done. Sometimes, the disagreement may tun sour, almost turn sour recently. And it could have spoilt our day or even the weekend. We make it a habit to settle conflicts or any disagreement on the day itself. No spilling it over to the next day. It won’t do any of us good. May bring the doctor more money because we may get headache.
I’m glad the “ordeal” is over. We learnt about what acceptance really meant to us. It means accepting us of who we really are, the good and the bad points of us. Remember in my earlier post? Marriage is the marriage of 4 persons, the couples as an adult plus their inner child.
I’m grateful to have such an understanding fiancee. I’m very lucky to have her and I will cherish her everyday. So even though both of us are not perfect, we are still who we are and for this we are unique – a unique couple!!! 😀
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Everyday, we took a bit of our time to discuss something related to the wedding no matter how tired we are. We delegated the tasks and encouraged each other to move on.
For example, it is not easy to find the bridal studio, hotel or photographer we like. For me, I did research on more than 15 hotels, visited about 3 and went back home to discuss for about a week. It is not just convincing each other but ALSO convincing each other’s families.
Different person has different concerns and opinions. It is like telling others why our decision is the best. It is not easy.
I had a friend who quarrelled everyday with his fiancee over financial matter. The other even thought of calling off their wedding. Some asked me if they can’t even handle a simple couple-project, how can they handle the rest of the journey after marriage. Some fear marriages inside because of the committment and the loss of “freedom”. Marriage is totally different from courtship period.<.div>?
There will be many thoughts, anxiety, worry, anticipation and concerns. Some even married due to some hidden agendas.
Marriage is not just related to individual. It affects everybody once the two families interlock each other and in the future, when the couples have their children. Don’t understand why nowadays people look for divorce as an easy way out. But this will be discussed in future postings.
So now, we move on. Hope we will settle the issue on the photographer/ videographer soon!!! By next week, I hope!!!
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:::::: A Fairytale Wedding on a Shoestring Budget by Melinda Barton ::::::
Just recently Melinda launched the Wedding Planning Manuscript. It is the book that came along with the ?Wedding Planning? package. So I just got my hands on the manuscript 2 hours ago and read it.
This is pretty good.
This stuff is BRILLIANT
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Here is some of what Melinda covers in the manuscript;
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– How to buy your dream wedding dress.
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