In life, we always want to be the best, always competing with the people around us.

When we are young, we compete against with our peers and siblings.

In the office, we compete against with our colleagues.

After we got married, sometimes we compete against with our spouses.

We are always competing. And we thought that we will never compete with the person we adore most. However, such competition is unavoidable in some marriages.

In a family especially in this era when the salary of both husband and wife can be the same, if not the salary of the latter can be more.

I wonder how does a man feel when his wife is more capable than him, earns more than him and is better than him in many ways.

Lets say for instance, my wife’s salary is more than mine and I’m in a career which many see as there is no future for me, I do feel quite depressed most of the times.

It was especially so when my mother-in-law was asking me when I will be switching line.

In Hong Kong, social work though amicable, can be seen as a lower grade career. The people who are in engineering or law fields are seemed as more “successful” and more “capable”.

What do you think?
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Yesterday, I was quite frustrated about the fact that my wife was home late and she forgot to abide to the pact we made many months ago.

The pact is to call home or drop me a message if anyone of us will be home late. We have to inform by 10pm.

However, she forgot.

Even though I may be quite angered by this encounter, I told myself it was quite a rare opportunity for her to meet up with her ex-classmates.

I started to put myself in her shoes and imagined how fun it was to be if I were hanging out with my old classmates.

It was like so much things to catch up with so little time.

This is like a change of focus, from what was bad to the better side.

In fact, do you know what is the reason for informing?
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I know exercising takes commitment especially when you need to literally drag the other significant half to the park to exercise with you.

Most of the times, we are bogged down with work. Who isn’t?

I’m glad my wife decided today to join me in an evening hike.

I thank her for her commitment as I’m sure it takes alot of thinking through to first put aside her work and join me in my exercise routine.

I know it is tough. It may be similarly tough for you to motivate your husband to join you in something you have always enjoyed.

In a relationship and especially in a marriage, it takes consistency to encourage your other significant half to be interested in your life.

However, before asking someone to be interested in our life, we have to be first interested in theirs.
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Men and women are different and they behave differently.

Women are very much of emotional creatures whereas men are more prone to run by logic.

That is why in a marriage, there is endless squabbles and complaints about the husband and wife.

In fact, I see as misunderstanding of each other.

Remember the book titled “Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars.” There is so much truth in it.

Men and women can never ever understand each other completely, even if they are together after fifty or sixty years.

In your marriage, was there a time that you complain about your husband for not knowing how you feel?

Was there a time that you told him “you should have done this or that“?

Was there a time that you mentioned “you should know what I am feeling right now“?
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There are many reasons for divorce and many times most cases can be salvage.

I am not here to teach you how to argue and win every time.

One can never win every time. And sometimes giving way to each other also means you have won.

How often do you argue with your spouse or partner?

What do you normally argue about?

Sometimes, the roots to these are from very minor stuff like different habits.

You want a good example?
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