Some couples only remember to celebrate during their birthdays, wedding anniversaries and other important occasions.

What if they treat everyday just like a wedding day?

from clarkflower.com

I would love to and I’m doing my best to follow this routine. There is no need any special occasion, and that is why I buy my wife a bouquet of flowers once a month to surprise her.

Even if she wanted a reason, I would say it is a prize for her for working so hard everyday.

Everyday, we ask about how each other’s day went. We are interested to hear what has happened throughout the whole day.

No filtering. No screening. We wanted to hear both the good and bad.

We make an effort to show interest in each other’s likings.
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Relationship is interestingly funny, in the sense there is hundred and one way to start a relationship.

To have a strong foundation in your after-wedding life, we need to start off from how the relationship is formed in the first place.

A friend was kind enough to share with me that how her brother-in-law started off as her tutor.

Others mentioned they started off when they were in the same faculty in colleges or Universities.

from motorcycletime.com

In fact, hostel stays in Universities had allowed infinite opportunities for opposite genders to spark off their romance.

Last year, I attended 9 wedding dinners in all (including solemnisation).

Many of my friends who got married last year started off as acquantainces in hostels. They started to meet in groups for meals in the hostel’s canteens and the group size gradually dwindled to a size of two.

Freedom, lots of it, is available in hostels without mom and dad watching over and this gave them freedom to plan their nights out and return hall late.

In fact, from what I understood the alternate floor stay for different gender was done on purpose for the obvious reason.

Hmmm, what about those who don’t stay in hostels?
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Marriage is a funny thing. We look forward to it so much and spend our entire savings on having the best wedding we can have.

And yet, newly-wed or long-term married couples do quarrel and have conflicts every now and then.

from poster.net

Likewise, courtship experience such patterns.

When you see the girl of your dream, you are determined to have her as your stead. And once you got her, maintaining the relationship requires more effort and hard work.

Moving from a stead-status to a wife-status becomes a partnership.

Similarly for marriage, it requires a life-time of commitment, perserverance, understanding and many more factors to build a strong foundation.

Planning wedding is easy. The tasks are simple. If some of you may find wedding-planning overwhelming, a hundred more times load and stress await you in marriage life.

I was talking to my female friend who had a tiff or two with her boyfriend once in a while. It is normal for many relationship. Even the best of friends do have disagreements once in a while.

They may be in the form of short spat, all-out shouting matches or stony silence.
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I have just came back from a seminar.

The trainer shared about a research done in 1994 by a group of psychologists on 100 pairs of newly wed couples.

from no-problem-marriage-
counseling.com

Each pair had a private room each and they were told to behave normally. They were each observed for 10 minutes.

The psychologists had to finished a questionaire stating the number of priases and put-downs give to each other.

10 years later, the psychologists followed up with this group of couples.

To their suprise, 94% of the couples were either separated or divorced. The couples who experienced marital breakdown were those who gave more put downs than praises.

This research showed that praises are very important elements for a successful and happy marriage.

I feel all of us want to be praised. We want to be praised for the effort we have put in, no matter how insignificant they are.

from theonion.com

We all need praises. So do our spouses.

What you can do right now to improve your relationship:
1. When your husband grumbles about how tired he is after a day of hard work, praise him for the effort he has put in to work hard and provide for the family. And tell him that the family appreciates him alot.

2. When your wife cooks and it may not be that tasty, praise her for the time spent in cooking and in buying of the cooking ingredients.
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Wedding ceremony and celebration is just a moment of happiness.

from dk186.tripod.com

Marriage is for eternality.

During courtship, when the couple is staying in different homes, there is no overlapping of personal space and privacy.

Couples, at this point in time, may only see the good points of each other.

They are still in the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

It is only after marriage, when both are sharing the same room, the same bed and the same house, there is intrusion of personal space and discomfort may arise.

Many married couples ask why it is that their partners had more flaws after getting married.

In fact, their partners did not changed. What had changed is their own perception on each other.

Expectations had increased. Tolerance level towards each other had dropped. There is less forgivings and understandings. There are lots more of “You should be this and that.” and “You must be like this or that.”

from guardianmedia.net.au

After getting married, one should be able to focus more on the partner’s strengths and move along in life. Focusing only on weaknesses and flaws are like slow poison to their relationship.

The Solmeniser shared another interesting story:
“There was once a husband who told the wife to burn the certificate of marriage.
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