Last Friday, when I was on a bus going home, I saw this middle-aged lady boarding the bus and standing still when she reached the first empty seat (the first seat nearest to the bus’ entrance)

This lady was standing in the way of others. Among the first few to have boarded the bus, she was preventing about 20 more people who wanted to board the bus.

A young lady behind this lady asked if she can move on so that others can board the bus. But this middle-aged lady snarled at her.

The middle-aged lady quickly put her bag on this empty seat and anxiously looked out of the window as if locating somebody, indifferent to the crowd of peple stuck at the bus’ entrance.

The young lady, given no choice, pushed her way through and accidentally hit the middle-aged lady who very quickly remarked that she was extremely rude to squeeze her way through.

How do you expect the young lady to move to the end of the bus when an elephant this blocking an aisle that can hardly fit a boar?

Later when a middle-aged man boarded the bus, this middle-aged lady hastily and dutifully move into the seat nearer to the window and allowing space for the man to go in. And she shut her eyes to rest.

It was as if nothing happened!!!

It appeared to me that this man seemed to be her husband. And is this how the wife defines “love to her husband” at the expense of delaying passengers from boarding the bus?

Can we justify that what the wife did was right because “she loves him so much”?

Although four days had passed, I still feel that what the wife did was not right though she was doing something “loving” for her husband.

I wonder what else could she do. What do you think?

After marriage, as much as we want to spend time with each other, the other agreement that we have is to respect each other’s personal space.

What do I mean by that?

Irregardless of during the period of courtship or being married, every one of us still wants to spend time alone and still do things we like to do.

A married friend once told me, when his wife wants to go out shopping or meet old friends, she still tells him. However, she is not seeking the husband’s permission but because she respects him and that is why she is telling him. In addition, the wife must inform the husband where she is going and what time she will be back so that the family won’t be worried if she comes home late.

Likewise for the husband, he can still go for his brothers’ gathering or go to some places he frequents when he was single. For example, he can still go to bookshop or catch a show alone if he enjoys that.

I have seen many couples wanting to change their spouses. “Why can’t you be like? Why can’t you be like that?”

Would you like it if your spouse want to change you…completely? I don’t think so. We don’t like to be changed. If changing is so easy, then the earth will spin upside down.

People are resistant to changes most of the times. We like to be who we are…be in equilibrium…to be in stable state.??

Having just married, we are still doing fine adjustments here and there. We still meet our own friends, do things we have always enjoyed…and many times….giving each other lots of personal space to grow and rest…

” I _____, take you ______, to be my wedded wife/husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness. ” – from myweddingvows.com

Yesterday, I attended my cousin’s solemnisation. The words that the solemniser said and the wedding couples repeated and vowed their life to them sounded so familiar.

I’m sure every married couple who went through the solemnisation do in some ways, still remember certain part of this marriage vow.

Let’s take a closer look at the marriage vows again – “To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.”

I’m wondering how much do the couples really understood them when they read it? …What do you think?

My understanding is – “to look after my wife everyday, making sure she is well and taking good care of her when she is not. to look forward to the time spent with her…to embrace her wholly including her strengths and flaws and with no expectation of changing her…and to live each day fully…as if it is my last day…”

I have received positive feedbacks on my blog and I will just share with you a few out of the many feedbacks I got:

from rachel: “i am new to your blog. enjoy reading your blog…”

from snow: ” thank u for helping the brides at singaporebrides.com really help us save lots of time and troubles…thanks again!!!”

from jane: “thanks brightstar for staying to help.. :)”

hihi Jhong Ren,

In regards to your “Thank You to My Readers” post, i will like to express a
big thank you to U! thanks for taking your time in sharing with us your
valuable experiences.

it has been very nice to chat with u in s’pore bride thread. at least,
i know i will have someone i can pour out to if i have any unhappiness in
wedding preparation.

best regards,
jane”

My VERY pretty cousin ROM today!!!

And these are the photos taken by me. >.< Happy Viewing!!!

10am – call every relative to formally invite them to her ROM
10.30am – Vist Make-Up artist to do her make-up and have her hair done

At ROM:
(1pm – My mom and I had reached the Registry of Marriage)
1.20pm – The arrival of my pretty cousin
1.30pm – Take of photos with the wedding couple
2pm – standby at the door of ROM and take queue number

Inside ROM:
2.05pm – with relatives & witnesses (normally the fathers), proceed from waiting area to Registry Office
2.05pm to 2.15pm – After saying marriage vows and signing the marriage certificate, the
Solemniser announced them “husband and wife”
2.15pm – Take group photo in the Registry Office

Outside ROM:
2.20pm – Take photos again outside ROM
2.30pm – Proceed to China Square to have tea
3pm – Tea and chit chat and take photos again
4.30pm – Leave the Tea House

I’m so delighted that my cousin had gotten married and I wana wish her and her boyfriend – oppss…no i mean husband all the best!!!

Items that you MUST bring to the Registry of Marriage:
1. Your Wife or Husband
2. Photographer
3. Witnesses
4. Identity cards of wedding couple and witnesses