I found this paragraph while surfing the web and it somehow reminds me it relates to a couple.
“Change is a natural process. We change as we learn and grow. We change as we make new decisions. We also find that we are required to change as our situations and relationships change. Sometimes we hope others will change in ways we wish or expect and are disappointed when they don?t. The need to adapt to changing circumstances can sometimes leave us feeling helpless, powerless, afraid, hurt or angry.”
How does it relate? It is up to how you infer. 😉
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Marriage includes four, not two. Recently I have read this book titled “Unlocking the secrets of your childhood memories”. This book talks about how we as adult still behave as child most of the times. There is nothing wrong with this because everyone is doing it. It is just that whether they are aware of it.?
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As the title suggests, we date the adult who is always on the best behavior. When couples got married, most married with high expectations that may tumble down fast. Some expectations can be unrealistic like must spend all his/ her time with me, must be able to read my mind, must know what the other spouse is thinking, must tell me “I love you” everyday (if not may think the spouse doesn’t care for the other anymore). and the list goes on.
Many times, while we were growing up as a child into adult, we may have more of certain things and may lack other things. For example, the husband may come from a family that doesn’t openly show love such as hugging. However, for the wife, she grows up among family members who hugs each other as way of showing care and concern. After marriage, the wife will be expecting the husband to hug her all the time (and the husband may feel uncomfortable in the first place or he may assumes one or two hugs will suffice.) Then, the wife may get angry and the husband may feel akward. Then, they may end up quarreling over the number of hugs she deserves. Yes, this is the presenting issue. But they have not understood the underlying issue is the different environment both are brought up as a child.
For those of you who feel this is confusing, do be fair to yourself and allow yourself enough time to process and digest what you have read. I feel this book can help us understand many couples each other better. Hope this info helps!!!
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The earring that I made
This is my first posting for my wedding blog. The blog is not entirely ready yet, but to kick-off the blog, I shall post something that is close to my heart. What you see here is a picture of a pair of earring.
I spent the night before Valentine’s Day at 10.30pm to create my very first pair of earrings for my fiancee. This is my first time doing it. At 11pm, I was twisting hooks, attaching the beads and aligning the strands of crystals late into the night. Hmmm. .finally after spending 4 hours of adjusting the earrings and another 1 hour quality-control, I could finally say I have completed making them. I was very satisfied about my work. Hmmm…hope my fiancee will love the earrings.
Making a pair of earring is never easy…it left minor bruises and cuts on my fingers. 🙁 The cutting and the bending of wires were not as easy as I had thought of earlier and I began to appreciate ladies’ accessories more. Let me give it a name…hmmm…what should it be…let me call it “j&j” representing the first initial of both our names.
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