One year after my wedding, I finally have time to meet up with some friends on Saturday night and it was a good catch up.

Two of us, including myself are married and we no doubt agree that our roles have been changing over time. And they still are.

Before marriage, we were bachelors always working for ourselves and we had the freedom to plan our daily schedule. We just have to work to bring in monthly income both for ourselves and our parents, at least for me.

I recalled while planning our wedding, it was not easy. I somehow felt the stretch in me, at least financially.

Finance was my biggest worry then and it still is.

Wedding took up most of my savings and drove my saving account to below zero mark. Luckily, my loving mother was helping me pay at least half of the bills and I still owe her the money.

After marriage, we have so much to plan for and these are the ones.

There are family planning, family time planning, family finance planning and many more.

And of course, not forgetting that I have vowed to pay my wife’s loan so that at least she can start off debt free.

Sad to say, most of us are in debts in any form. Some took tuition loans from bank for their degrees, others spent lavishly sweeping their credit cards and end up with lots of bad debts.

For those who own cars, the majority don’t pay them in full and they get loans instead.

It is likewise for those who own flats.

I have a dream of owning my business and paying off my wife’s debt. And in 10 years’ time, we own this little villa facing the sea and we will walk our dogs and bring our children for daily evening walks.

This is a dream I want to fulfill, in my this lifetime.

And to fulfill this dream, I have to work hard as a husband. It is not fair to impose all these burdens on my wife and make her work equally hard, if not harder, as me.

It is my dream, not hers. No…It is our dream and I’m carrying the burden, full load on my shoulders.

This is my role, a husband’s role in a marriage, in my understanding.