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Ups and Downs since Friday

Yesterday, my fiancee and I did two things:

1) Went to House of Etiquette to check on the rental of kua

2) Went to Chinatown Complex temporary site to buy the customary items

Was dead tired when I reached home. And was “rewarded” with scolding from mom when I reached home.

She scolded me for many things…

1) not updating her of what I have done (my inner thoughts: contradicts to what she told: “I will leave all decisions to you.”)

2) not telling her about my problems (hello…this is the family norms…we solve our own problems….how could you expect I tell you my problem and for the past 12 years, you never told me yours?)

3) Plus she always ended off our one-way conversation from her that “I always rebut against her” (how could you expect me to comfortably share with you my problems when everytime you said I rebut against you?)

Throughout the whole of 1 hour of lecture, I kept silent with my back facing her. My mom kept on complaining she can’t stand the stress from the wedding and she is going bonkers. And she expected me to understand that.

I doubt I can or ever will. She never give me a chance to and with her commanding tone whenever she speaks to me, I had always shut myself up and out. Whatever she said enters from one ear and comes out from the other.

Plus, now I’m facing some personal challenges now. work, study, wedding and many more issues running wild in my mind 24/7. It is not easy. Inside me, I’m crying for help. And yet, I can’t turn to my family.

Today, I was out of the house the whole day…hoping to find some peace…which at this moment, my home can’t provide me with this. :_(

Hopefully, things will get better soon…

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2 Responses to “Ups and Downs since Friday”

  1. 1
    MH Says:

    It is never easy to deal with parent child relationoship. If you take a step back and put yourself in her shoes you should be able to see where she is coming from. Coming from a single parent family makes it even more impt for you to balance your life after marriage for you are all staying under 1 roof. Other than spending time with ur wife, make time for your mum. It has not been easy for her for the past 12 yrs bringing yu up alone. U need to compromise n take that step to understand her.
    I was much more rebellious than u while growing up n still have my occassional bickering n unhappiness with my folks… but at the end of the day ur parents r the only one who give u unconditional love although they may not express it the way we wish they would. I wish u well… can always look for me when i am back to chat 🙂

  2. 2
    Jhong Ren Says:

    MH..thanks for the reply….hope that whatever is discussed here will be kept here….:)

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