Some of us have fantastic mother-in-laws from heaven while others come from hell. As a daughter-in-law, (or son-in-law), you will need to be strategic in your management.

Sometimes, it feels sucky to be squeezed in the middle and feeling helpess.

Here are my 37 Ways to Deal with Mother-in-law: (I will be compiling this list to 101.)
1. Be respectful to her
2. Be polite when talking to her
3. Be sensitive to her different needs
4. Be sensitive to her emotional changes (she may be going through menopause)
5. Be aware of her sense of loss of a daughter
6. Bring her out once in two weeks
7. Take her to her favourite restuarant
8. Remember her birthday
9. Send her gifts that she really like
10. Remember her wedding annivesary
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By Brenda Stokes

Do you have a difficult time getting along with your partner’s parents? You’re not alone. Find out why your in-laws act the way they do and learn to gracefully manage stressful family situations.

As husband and wife, you’ve decided to host a big dinner at your house. All of the family will be there, and you’re excited to show off the kids and spend time with those you love. That is until your mother-in-law enters the room. From the moment her foot crosses the threshold, she’s all criticism. “I wouldn’t have picked this carpet,” she may say. Or, “The chicken is a little dry, dear.” Meanwhile, a smile is on her face, and you have to grin and bear it.

This sort of thing happens to people regardless of how long they’ve been married. A mother-in-law can be so intrusive and bossy that you just don’t know what to do with yourself. You don’t want to be disrespectful, yet you can’t tolerate being walked on, either. It’s a nasty predicament, but it may help to learn that there are reasons for your mother-in-law’s stereotypical behavior and ways to gracefully maneuver through difficult in-law situations.

Why Your Mother-In-Law Does What She Does

Older relatives frequently take on an authoritative role in the family. “The friction and tensions with know-it-all mothers-in-law come from a parent’s belief that no one is quite good enough for her son or daughter,” says Dr. Susan Newman, PhD, social psychologist and author of The Book of No: 250 Ways to Say It?and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever.

This tension, most typically felt between women and their mothers-in-law rather than between men and theirs, occurs because these are “two women in love with the same man,” according to Debbie Mandel, author of Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul and Changing Habits: The Caregivers’ Total Workout.
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Who knows how to be the most ideal son-in-law?

Do you?

This is a tough question to be answered. I’m sure some of you will be thinking of how on earth can this impossible task be accomplished.

I have heard of mother-in-laws swearing at their son-in-laws for not being filial. And for the minority of you, I’m sure you are very well-loved by your mothe-in-laws.

No, it is not because you are extra handsome or charismatic such that you are well-loved by your mother-in-laws.

It is most probably you have done something really different from others and in fact, special such that your mother-in-laws love you so much, sometimes more than their daughters.

7 Ways Not to Offend Your Mother-In-Law

1. Respect your mother-in-law
Respect her just like how you would treat your own mother. And treat her in a very polite, courteous and respectful manner.

In fact, this is a simple rule which all of us like. We love to be treated in the right manner. All of us feel good when we are well-treated.

2. Bring her out once in a while
Some of you may be saying “What?!! You must be crazy to even think about this?”

I think this is a really tough task for some of you. When you bring your mother-in-law out for a meal or shopping, there are only two of you. You may have to talk to her face-to-face for the next 3 to 5 hours or so. And this can be worse than having the worst nightmare you can get.

Going out with her can allow you to spend some personal time to know your mother-in-law well. And do remember to pay for her meals too.
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