I wasn’t well for these past few days and I was down with flu and slight fever.

I’m grateful to my wife for skipping her dinner even though she was really very hungry and had not had her lunch.

The wait at the clinic was an hour and you know that when a person is ill, an hour long wait can feel like 5 hours or more.

While making my way to the clinic and feeling her warm hand in mine, I remembered our wedding vows very vividly.

It goes something like this:

“Male:
I _____, take you ______, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.

Female:
I, _____, take you ______, to be my wedded husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.”

Sometimes I wonder how many of us do really remember the wedding vows we took, except to bluntly just follow them word by word.
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Men and women are different and they behave differently.

Women are very much of emotional creatures whereas men are more prone to run by logic.

That is why in a marriage, there is endless squabbles and complaints about the husband and wife.

In fact, I see as misunderstanding of each other.

Remember the book titled “Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars.” There is so much truth in it.

Men and women can never ever understand each other completely, even if they are together after fifty or sixty years.

In your marriage, was there a time that you complain about your husband for not knowing how you feel?

Was there a time that you told him “you should have done this or that“?

Was there a time that you mentioned “you should know what I am feeling right now“?
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Having conflicts are natural. It is healthy to have conflicts.

“What? Are you nuts?”

Looking back at my fist 9 months of marriage life, it has not been easy.

I’m not saying that we are in crisis or any similar form. Thank goodness we are not.

While looking at the days we have walked through together and effort we have put in, I could say we can score about 6 upon 10. (Still lots of room for improvement, you know.)

What we have done so far:

1. A gentle stroll round our house

I remember that we made an effort to stroll around the estate every night without fail.

These are personal times we could catch up with each other.

There are so many things to talk about. I just don’t understand how come older couples find each other bored. Maybe they just don’t want to talk. Just maybe.

Every day there are so many things going on. I just can’t wait to tell my wife about it when I reach home.

However, I must confess that it is not easy to be consistent. There are times we are very busy or one of us is busy. There are times that we simply forgot or are not bothered about it at all.

We need each other to constantly remind us now and then.

2. Exercising regularly
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I was thinking for the whole night what is difference between my wedding blog compared to other more popular ones like weddingbee.com and ohjoys.blog.com. They are always recommending wedding items to buy or wedding items other brides use, in my own opinion.

To pull oneself through the ups and downs of wedding planning, there is more to getting the tasks completed and items prepared. I feel brides and grooms from across the globe need more support in terms of emotional aspect.

I feel more can be shared on how you can sustain your flame with your spouse while planning your wedding and after marriage. I think my wedding blog will be sharing with you more on relationship tips to sustain marriage for the newly-weds.

OKie, I digress abit. Tomorrow is 1st September which has always been Teachers’ Day when students from all schools celebrate.

There will be celebration in schools. And for those more favored teachers, their desks will always be packed with gifts and flowers from students who adore them.

For those who are more hated or dislike, their desks will be empty. Thus, Teachers’ Day is a the judgement day when teachers’ popularity are measured in relation to the gifts they received.

Once a year, teachers’ efforts are rewarded. However, it is only on this day that we, as students, show our appreciation to the teachers. I hope not.

Similarly to our anniversaries when we first meet our wives, when we first kissed, when we first held hands, when we first got together as an official couple, when we got married and so on, is it only on these “special” days that we reward our spouse with tender, loving care.

In my own opinion, everyday should be a day when we treat our spouse with the utmost love she can get, as if it is our last day on earth.
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Men and women are not alike. Men will never understand why women talk so much and can feel so much. And women will never understand what is in a man’s brain. (Not necessarily sex all the time.)

However, there is a similarity between men and women. (Thank God there is some way to talk sense into women somehow.)

The similarity is something each of us wants and really wish for. Do remember this after your wedding.

Do you know what it is?

It is called “respect”.

Each of us wants to be treated with dignity. We don’t want to be spat at and neither do we want our esteem to be tattered.

All of us want to be treated with the utmost respect.

And so do you, be it you are a man or woman reading this post.

After posting this post, a reader emailed me that “wow, you can read a person inside out and won’t it be scary? Aren’t you manipulating other people’s feelings too?”

I don’t think so. Neither do I see as a manipulation of feelings. I prefer to see it as a conscious effort to place my spouse’ position in all discussion.

As the cliche says, put yourself in other people’s shoes. It is very true indeed.

Those couples who are not conscious about what they say and not say (their non-verbal) are actually doing more harm.

Let’s say you may be unaware that you are infact rebellious even though people see you as soft and easy-going. Part of your nature may be ready to retaliate, possibly because at home you never had the chance to in front of your authoritarian parents.

So one day, your wife said something in a similar stern tone as what your dad did in the past to you as a little girl. Something in you is triggered and you barked them without hesistation and stormed off.
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