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photo from monkeyiron

Dating has always been part of the entire courtship experience.

What happens when you see this handsome guy across the hall?

He saw you too and walked up to you. You don’t know why but your heart was pounding faster and faster.

Both of you chatted for a short while and he asked for a date.

Do you say “yes”?
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In life, we always want to be the best, always competing with the people around us.

When we are young, we compete against with our peers and siblings.

In the office, we compete against with our colleagues.

After we got married, sometimes we compete against with our spouses.

We are always competing. And we thought that we will never compete with the person we adore most. However, such competition is unavoidable in some marriages.

In a family especially in this era when the salary of both husband and wife can be the same, if not the salary of the latter can be more.

I wonder how does a man feel when his wife is more capable than him, earns more than him and is better than him in many ways.

Lets say for instance, my wife’s salary is more than mine and I’m in a career which many see as there is no future for me, I do feel quite depressed most of the times.

It was especially so when my mother-in-law was asking me when I will be switching line.

In Hong Kong, social work though amicable, can be seen as a lower grade career. The people who are in engineering or law fields are seemed as more “successful” and more “capable”.

What do you think?
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Today I received an email from a ex-subscriber to My Wedding Blog.

In the reason she gave was “No Longer Preparing Wedding“.

Immediately there are a few thoughts on my mind.

Is she not preparing her wedding because it has been postponed?

Or is it cancelled?

I have a couple of experiences when some other previous brides emailed me thanking me for my help and in addition to that, they mentioned that they no longer needed my help.

I was elated initially as I thought their weddings were over. However, they explained that their weddings were called off due to some unforseen circumstances.

I was saddened to hear such news. Inevitably, in my journey to provide help for all brides and grooms who are preparing for their weddings, I will still hear such news which are unavoidable in the long run.

Sad or not sad, it is up to the bride herself to decipher.

I have some ex-brides who emailed me again a few weeks after their weddings were called off, sharing that the decision was indeed appropriate when they gave it more thoughts.
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I know exercising takes commitment especially when you need to literally drag the other significant half to the park to exercise with you.

Most of the times, we are bogged down with work. Who isn’t?

I’m glad my wife decided today to join me in an evening hike.

I thank her for her commitment as I’m sure it takes alot of thinking through to first put aside her work and join me in my exercise routine.

I know it is tough. It may be similarly tough for you to motivate your husband to join you in something you have always enjoyed.

In a relationship and especially in a marriage, it takes consistency to encourage your other significant half to be interested in your life.

However, before asking someone to be interested in our life, we have to be first interested in theirs.
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There are many reasons for divorce and many times most cases can be salvage.

I am not here to teach you how to argue and win every time.

One can never win every time. And sometimes giving way to each other also means you have won.

How often do you argue with your spouse or partner?

What do you normally argue about?

Sometimes, the roots to these are from very minor stuff like different habits.

You want a good example?
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It was my breaking of record.

Have you ever stayed in your wife’s office till 4am?

I just did a few days ago.

It was initially madness as it was my first time doing that.

However, when I come to think about it, it was a good chance for me to observe for myself why she is so busy all the time.

I think it was like those school days when you get to visit your parents’ offices and you awed in amazement.

And after that day, you got to understand your parents a little bit better.

If your wife is busy all the time, you may want to meet her for dinner and pop by her office after that.

I know it is not easy.
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