One year after my wedding, I finally have time to meet up with some friends on Saturday night and it was a good catch up.

Two of us, including myself are married and we no doubt agree that our roles have been changing over time. And they still are.

Before marriage, we were bachelors always working for ourselves and we had the freedom to plan our daily schedule. We just have to work to bring in monthly income both for ourselves and our parents, at least for me.

I recalled while planning our wedding, it was not easy. I somehow felt the stretch in me, at least financially.

Finance was my biggest worry then and it still is.

Wedding took up most of my savings and drove my saving account to below zero mark. Luckily, my loving mother was helping me pay at least half of the bills and I still owe her the money.

After marriage, we have so much to plan for and these are the ones.
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My life at this moment, seemed to be going through a valley.

There are uphills and downhills. And there are 100 times more downhills than uphills.

Determined to do whatever it takes to provide a life slightly better for my wife and my mother, I have embarked on building my own business ever since last year 2006.

A year of blogging on wedding and 6 months of “wedding planning e-book” creation are certainly not easy to be jungled.

Yes, I have a full time job. And when I got home daily, I spent at least 6 hours on building my business.

So each day, I worked at least 18 hours.

It was not easy to move through the swamp of obstacles that have been laid in front of me.
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Lately, you may have noticed a drop in the number of posts. I apologised for it as I was really busy working my job and building my dream.

“My New Wedding e-Book Cover” >.<

My new Wedding Planning e-book is about to be launched soon and I’m doing another project with some very good friends of mine.

I would like to talk about these male friends I have. They are all married and we all have a common dream.

We all work towards the common dream of giving our wives a better and more comfortable life.

I remember Warren Buffett, the 2nd richest man in the world once expressed in the press conference how he had changed after becoming a very wealthy man.

He mentioned he didn’t change much. It was just that his wife lives slightly better.

Marriage life has definitely changed me for the better.
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From Sandra:

“Hi Jhong Ren

Thanks for the reply and for your amazing blog, the information available is pretty comprehensive and useful.

I am currently at the stage of planning my wedding for next year .. toughest aspect is to decide the exact date and to agree on what exactly do we want for our wedding. My fiance is really busy and seems like I have to be the one doing most of the work … I want a simple garden wedding reception while his parents expect a grand wedding dinner with really good food and I just feel overwhelmed and unsupported with the responsibility…..currently at the stage of feeling stressed and afraid that I might become a bridezilla …

Hee .. sorry that I have to offload like that … just needed a neutral party who understands … wedding matters can plan, but relationship issues cannot plan …

Need to be reminded to keep my focus on our relationship … not let all the wedding affairs affect us … want to be there for the long haul … trying my best to keep myself at peace …”

My thoughts:
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My cousin will be getting married really soon and I am elated for her nuptial.

I feel delighted and my thoughts were pre-occupied with the happenings of last year.

I was married last year and exactly a year ago, I was feeling frustrated, tense and anxious.

Yes, I was very excited over my wedding.

However, there were so many unpredictable things happening every week and these things were driving me crazy.

Yes, crazy is the word to describe my wedding preparation!

There were money issues, mother-in-law’s issues, wedding preparation issues and other inevitable invisble issues.

My head was literally cramped with stuff and yes, I remembered I was having my few examinations for my Gradute Diploma.

I was triply stressed: wedding, exam and work!
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Yesterday, I was quite frustrated about the fact that my wife was home late and she forgot to abide to the pact we made many months ago.

The pact is to call home or drop me a message if anyone of us will be home late. We have to inform by 10pm.

However, she forgot.

Even though I may be quite angered by this encounter, I told myself it was quite a rare opportunity for her to meet up with her ex-classmates.

I started to put myself in her shoes and imagined how fun it was to be if I were hanging out with my old classmates.

It was like so much things to catch up with so little time.

This is like a change of focus, from what was bad to the better side.

In fact, do you know what is the reason for informing?
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I wasn’t well for these past few days and I was down with flu and slight fever.

I’m grateful to my wife for skipping her dinner even though she was really very hungry and had not had her lunch.

The wait at the clinic was an hour and you know that when a person is ill, an hour long wait can feel like 5 hours or more.

While making my way to the clinic and feeling her warm hand in mine, I remembered our wedding vows very vividly.

It goes something like this:

“Male:
I _____, take you ______, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.

Female:
I, _____, take you ______, to be my wedded husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, ’till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.”

Sometimes I wonder how many of us do really remember the wedding vows we took, except to bluntly just follow them word by word.
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