Learn the Secrets Of Saving More Money For Your Wedding!

It's All In My 100% FREE, No Strings Attached Wedding Ebook!

>>Download Here Now!<<

Archive for March, 2007

Who has Control Over My Wedding?

Wedding day was meant to be the happiest day in a person’s life…

But sometimes, too much practices and concerns can tear this wedding day into shreds…making us both Happy & Sad :?

happy and sad wedding

I’m talking about family beliefs and practices

Different cultures have different practices…

Some dialect groups aren’t even sure of what they have to do and they hear from here and there and came up with thier own practices which they deemed as “100% real and guaranteed and MUST DO”

I had this experience from my mother-in-law that she mentioned we must not have sliding doors for our cloth cabinets because it will block out good luck. We must have have doors that pivot at the edge, just like older days.

There is another more interesting one that we must not have the cushion placed at the end of the bed or we will “quarrel very often”.

My reaction…”Huh? :?”

Many times, we have to say “yes” to our parents and meanwhile. move ahead with our own plans.

In this new generation, there many many tradition wedding practices that are long forgotten. However, some families still practise that.

For example, for Teochew, the groom, being the younger one to get married, must together with the bride, walked under the elder brother’s trousers before they enter the house.

As times passed, we, the post-war babies, distorted and twsited the practices to something more fun and more to our taste.

Traditionally, the friends have to disturb the wedding couple in their room because it was believed that there are demons and evils inside and so they must be scared away by the loud noises.

Now, friends disturb the wedding couple because it was fun!!!

I remembered while planning our wedding, we have different inputs here and there from different aunties, grandparents and even our own parents.

And, all these deafening noises, which are supposed to be for “our own good”, turned out to be very stressful for the couple. The worse things is that the people who gave these inputs are not sensitive enough to notice.

So there are alot of times, we have to cover both our ears..and maybe eyes…and remind that we have to plan our life…we are growing up…and we got to take control of our own lives…

Sad to say, not many people have the luxury to do the same thing like me.

Some parents threatened to sever the ties if their children don’t follow the practices. Others curse and swear at their own children plus the spouse-to-be…
Continue Reading »

Meet My Family

meet the robinson

Just watched the movie “Meet The Robinsons” which depicts a story of an orphan boy who eventually found acceptance in a family…

Talking about family, family is really important to wedding-planning…not just to show up for the actual day but also to provide support and resources during the journey of planning of the wedding…

I had lots of help from my family and relatives…

My relative who owned a printing firm provided free printing of my wedding card inserts…other relatives provide me 6 cars on the actual day plus when I deliver the wedding invitation cards…

some other relatives even provided the love and care when they realised that I’m super stressed up by the wedding…simple things like a word of concern or brewing of herbal tea for me to drink…

Not forgetting my friends, they are my helpers ranging from photographer to drivers to personal assistants and so on…

Last year was quite a lucky year for Chinese…and many of my friends who are of simliar age got married…about 10 of them in total

Some were lucky to have support from friends and families…

Others were not so fortunate…I have a friend who is a foreigner did not have the luxury of having her family in Singapore to help her…she had to depend heavily on friends…

However, nothing beats the word of care and comfort from our very own parents, especially our mother…

My friend was at loss and felt torn when she was stressed up by her future mother-in-law at that time…Her mother-in-law was not understanding enough to stop adding stress and pressure onto her…

My friend got so stressed up that she purposely returned home just before midnight so that the mother-in-law had already slept…
Continue Reading »

Planning Your Wedding…while Suffocating Yourself?

As Featured On Ezine Articles

Wedding planning is a big project…a mega project, many times bigger than the multi-million project you have ever handled in your career…

Wedding planning can be such a large scale event that it may have suffocated many brides and grooms…physically, mentally, emotionally…and even in terms of their relationships

wedding suffocate

I have heard from some friends who mentioned…that their boy-friends specifically told them not to include them during gown-fitting as it is going to be a waste of their precious time

others take it much more easily and are not really bothered when they failed to get the hotels…the bridal studios or the gowns the bride wanted…they just take it easy…

though such way of coping can be healthy by not increasing unnecessary stress, it can be quite a disturbing scene to bride who will become doubtful of the committment from the groom…

There will also be cases when the groom had to go overseas to work and leave the entire planning to the bride…and only to blame her when things didn’t go the way he wants to be…

The abov scenarios can happened to anyone…not just the bride…situation can be caused by some insensitive brides too.

I remembered while I was planning my wedding, my wife was very busy with her new adjsutment to her career….and she really needed the space and time to get herself familiarise with her new environment…so I did some of the planning and execution initially…

Later, due to my coming exams for my second degree…my wife helped me alot by taking over the coordination and planning…

Wedding-planning became a partnership between us and we definitely learnt alot from there…

We learnt about prioritising and delegating the tasks based on our strengths…my wife is more vocal and she did all the calling…I did most of the planning and coordination and sourcing out for hotels for etc…

and what is really interesting, we partnered to squeeze the 2nd free helper’s room from the hotel…we didn’t really intend to get it…it is not a must….

but it turned out to be fun when I strategised how to go about “demanding” from the hotel what we want because “they have screwed up somewhere else“…it was really exciting to do something so dangerous together…

Planning wedding should be fun…no doubt it can be a roller-coaster ride with times the tram may even veered too far off the track…it should also be exciting…

PLUS what had been helpful for us is we live with the decision each other made and we didn’t question why or ask for more…we know we had done our best…
Continue Reading »

Single Parent

As Featured On Ezine Articles

Some people do ask me if growing up in a single-parent family has any impact on me. The answer is definitely yes.

We are after all human being with feelings and whatever loss we experience since young will have impact on us.

baby hand

To me, marriage is for an enternity and as much as we want it to last forever, we still have to live by the moments, meaning cherish every single moment that we have with our love ones.

We will never be sure how many moments we still have in this world, isn’t it?

There are many times I still don’t really understand why couple divorced:(

Though the time I spent with my dad was a short one, lasting merely for 12 to 14 years, I must say that his influence on me is alot.

When young, I have always seen how my dad showered his care and concern on my mommy. He spent every single moment that he has bringing her on holidays, going for tim-sum (Chinese tea-break) and snapping photos of her.

My daddy really loves my mommy alot and he worked really hard, taking more than ten accounting assignments home so that he could provide more for his family. Yet, no matter how busy he was, he would spent his time guiding me in my studies and he would then worked till late into the night.

My father was a great man!

My mother once told me that despite the time she spent wth her husband was only a short one. However, she always remembers all the things he had done for her…such as looking after her when she was unwell…doing most of the housechores…and strivng so hard to father me from cooking my meals to bringing me home from school…
Continue Reading »

How Many Transitions will there be..after Wedding?

How many cross road will there be after wedding?

wedding cross road

Or you being married….which transition in life are you at now?

We have to face changes in our lives many times over whether we like it or not.

There are making new friends…new girl friends or boy friends…a wedding to go through…setting up a new family…

Even after marriage, when the wife moves into the husband’s home, there is alot of adjustment for her too…such as fitting into the family’s routines…waking up early to do marketing…doing the housechores…etc…PLUS meeting the expectations of parent-in-laws.

Likewise for the husband, the wife’s family may have different expectation on the new “son”…such as abiding by their family’s rules and guidelines…contributing to the family’s expenditure, calling the parents “mommy” and “daddy” and so on…(I’m sure you, as you are reading this post…you do have more to contribute…)

I was reading this post from from this blog that because they are in the process of relocating, the author, who is the husband, has to stop blogging for a period of time…Hmmm…after that, he will have to spend another period of time to readjust and also making sure his family is getting used to the new environment…

Married couple, for the very first time, have a taste of getting familiar to their new surrounding…not just because they have moved into a new house…but most importantly, they have started to live close to each other…

Last time, they were dating once a week or at most twice…

Now, the couple sees each other almost everyday…there will certainly be intrusion into each other’s personal space

For me, my personal space is very big…partially because being the only child in the family and I have my own bedroom and study room all to myself…
Continue Reading »