Conflicts (if Managed Well) can Bring Relationship to Higher Level

This blog won't be complete if I just post the positive side of a relationship. Conflicts and Happy moments come in a package. The tools of handling the conflicts and whether you know how to cherish the Happy moments are learnt during the relationship. 

We have our fair share of disaggrements and conflicts and misunderstandings. Which couple doesn't? If there is, better watch out. A dormant volcano may suddenly erupt with a very very loud BOOM!!! And the mess will be hard to clean up. It is always easier to clean up the mess that come in small amount now and then.

Don't know what I am saying? I am referring to the quarrels and arguments that may come now and then and catch both of you off guard. Not managing well may bring your relationship downslope.

Lately, we have some issues that we disagreed on. It led to some arguments. I won't really say we shout at each other like what we see in TV dramas. But we negotiated and mediated among ourselves. We kept cool and kept our volume down. Remeber to phrase your words properly. Don't say "You". It sounds threatening and sound pushing the blame on others. Use"I"…I feel this, I feel that…Lots of clarifications on what the party is saying.

We talked it out and constantly reminded each other that we are tackling the issue, and not against the other party. Phrase your sentences, no harsh words…or else you will regret!!!

Easier said to be done. Sometimes, the disagreement may tun sour, almost turn sour recently. And it could have spoilt our day or even the weekend. We make it a habit to settle conflicts or any disagreement on the day itself. No spilling it over to the next day. It won't do any of us good. May bring the doctor more money because we may get headache.

I'm glad the "ordeal" is over. We learnt about what acceptance really meant to us. It means accepting us of who we really are, the good and the bad points of us. Remember in my earlier post? Marriage is the marriage of 4 persons, the couples as an adult plus their inner child.

I'm grateful to have such an understanding fiancee. I'm very lucky to have her and I will cherish her everyday. So even though both of us are not perfect, we are still who we are and for this we are unique - a unique couple!!!